The Conscious Psychedelic Explorer | Member Case Study
What can you expect to learn inside The Conscious Psychedelic Explorer course?
A member from the last cohort recently reached out to me to report back after embarking upon their first session since completing the program. Their email message displays a shining example of some of the lessons from the course being put into practice, and so with their permission, I share their write-up here.
To me this just shows exemplifies a careful and respectful approach to a psychedelic session duly rewarded. I hope it can inspire you in your preparation too.
Here’s the report:
I wanted to reach out directly. My experience yesterday was the culmination of over 3 years of therapy and 2 years of working with psychedelics. It was by far the deepest and I know holds the most potential for change of anything I have ever experienced.
I used a lot of what I learned in your course to plan and carry out this experience, with that you absolutely had a role in its success. For that, I say thank you! I appreciate that you took the time to put it together and your passion in presenting.
I wrote the below “trip report” in the day leading up to and yesterday. I did want you to see it though so you could see some of your work in application.
Spoiler alert, I personally don’t think it is productive to read “Trip reports” of other people’s experiences. I have done this in the past and it has only led to me second-guessing or trying to drive my experiences because of what I thought they should look like.
I am thoroughly convinced each experience is an individual gift and no two will be the same. Past that, every time I have tried to describe what took place in one of my experiences I sounded like this crazy old man, well more than normal anyway, so I quit trying.
This report is an outline or “report” if you will of what I did leading up to what I consider a very successful, productive experience. Not that following my path will make your experience successful but perhaps you can see some actions that may make it better for you as I did in John’s course.
I got my intention about 3 months ago. That is typically how I work; it will just come to me at some point, and I will know it’s time to start prepping for the next experience. My intention for this experience was to “Work with and address my inner trauma”. Sounds like a party, right? Well to be honest this was obviously going to be shadow work, I had a distinct inner comfort in the prospect of healing in this way.
It took me over 3 months to schedule the event due in part to my internal preparation. I have found that if I spend some time trying to refine and get my head around what I think the details of the intention are I will be better prepared on the day of the healing. I also had some scheduling challenges to get through.
I only have experience with Psilocybin and MDMA, I have heard Psilocybin described as “Spiritual” and MDMA described as “Psychological”, that description settled in well with me. In this case, I saw the healing as more of a dialog and integration of my trauma so in my head MDMA seemed to be the perfect fit. I reflect as much I can on the chosen medicine and its mechanisms as I work on my intention.
For this event, after I had decided it needed to be scheduled I revisited our course material. Trying to incorporate as much as I could as I re-listened to the content.
Schedule the day.
I did choose, for this event to schedule a day. I discussed it with my wife, we agreed on a day, I cleared my calendar and we both worked to protect that day from being rescheduled.
I made the agreement to accept the music for what it is and enjoy what it brings. Most of you have heard me talk about music, it has been a bit of a challenge for me. For this experience I made the agreement that I would accept what was in the chosen playlist unless it was completely taking me sideways.
Next, I agreed to go to the bathroom when I first noticed the need. This was brought up in the course and hit home with me.
As inspired by folks in this group my first clearing exercise was the decision to be open with my kids about my activities. This cleared a lot of emotional baggage as well as the day. My scheduled day was a Saturday. I have always scheduled during the week and typically in the evening or nighttime to avoid interaction with my kids.
I also worked to clear my work calendar so the Friday prior to my event was an easy day. The most prominent thing here was to reschedule a touchpoint meeting with my boss. We don’t always see things the same and I didn’t want to risk the drama just before to my event, so I rescheduled. The upshot to that was I had the call earlier in the week and it was a positive interaction.
Starting the Sunday before I chose to abstain from alcohol, I typically do this for 24 hours prior to my events but started early this time to evaluate my relationship with alcohol.
Tried to eat cleaner for the week leading up to the event. To say I ate clean would be stretching the truth, ok, it would be a lie, but I did do much better.
Gave my room a thorough cleaning the Friday before, including clean sheets on the bed and a clean towel for my ritual shower prior to taking the medicine.
Abstained from sex beginning Thursday night. MDMA elicits a serotonin dump but so does sex. To ensure I have serotonin to dump I try to keep the storehouse full prior to taking the medicine.
Made it a point to get to bed early so I would be well-rested for my event. No real reason to be up late after that last step anyway, right?
Starting Friday morning, no news, no talk radio, no social media, and no TV.
I typically get up early, meditate and read for an hour. I refrained from reading the day of the event. I want to focus on my intention, and I get easily sidetracked so no reason to possibly introduce some new concept that may take me off my path.
- Wake up at about 7 to meditate. I will have coffee and maybe a few almonds very early but stop liquid intake at least an hour before I take the medicine, back to that not wanting to get up to go to the bathroom thing.
- I will get a “purge vessel” cool name for a Home Depot 5-gallon bucket. I place this right next to the bed. I have, thankfully, never had to use it but I like that it’s there.
- Make the bed up with my pillows and an extra blanket.
- Lay out the headphones.
- Download my playlist, I use Spotify. In the Spotify settings on your device, you can set the download quality to high. I have mine set to high, not sure if there is a difference or not?
- Download a backup playlist. I know, I am not forgetting my “agreement” but you can’t be too careful
- Download another backup playlist, going to be REALLY careful.
- Take the device I am playing music on off the network
- Sit down and journal my intention, trying to allow it to flow and allow any details or the story to unfold as a write. I do this just until the natural flow has stopped.
- Take a shower.
- Measure out my medicine and the booster into two shot glasses.
- Give my wife my phone.
- Take initial dose, followed by the booster in 2 hours.
Integration begins the night of the event. I journal for integration and will continue doing that in the days/weeks that follow an event.
I can say with calm certainty that this was the deepest event I have ever had, with what I consider the most potential for change. The work to integrate it will determine how much of it I get to keep.
The Conscious Psychedelic Explorer reopens for another cohort of 10 on the 10th of January 2023.
You can join the waitlist to get first access to places here.
Live Calls are at 7pm UK time / 2pm EST on:
- Thursday 19th January
- Thursday 26th January
- Thursday 2nd February
- Thursday 9th February
- Thursday 16th February
- Thursday 23rd February
More information can be found on the course page.
If you have any further questions or would like to talk, feel free to send me a message directly or book a call.